Blog Post: Yes, Virginia, it is OK to negotiate (part 2)

My colleague sent a thoughtful response to my recent question, "what role should you be starring in when you begin to negotiate; 1) job seeker 2) #1 candidate or 3) new hiree?". She correctly chose "#1 candidate" and her reason is provided here.

"I thought the answer would be when you are made the offer, that is when you can negotiate. I have an example for you: I know of a candidate who was selected even though he was not the front runner going in to the interview (he did not know this). Why? Because his focus was on what HE could contribute to the job. The other candidate (with the "stronger" background) led with questions/concerns about pay. The hiring manager assessed this as a sign that the candidate was not as interested in the job, and viewed the pay concerns as a "red flag". So, the person who began as the preferred candidate eliminated himself by prematurely raising the topic of pay before the offer was extended. Once an offer is extended, the candidate moves into the space of "hiree" in the mind of the employer, regardless of whether the offer has been accepted yet."

Let me expand upon her wisdom with a shopping analogy that demystifies how employers make their "purchases". How often do you go shopping and find that the item you want is missing it's price? You look high and low on the shelves and can't find it anywhere. If you really like the appearance, description and listed contents, you will probably put it in your cart with the intent of finding the price out before you reach the check out line.

This example is similar to when an employer asks you during a screening phone call or first interview, "how much are you looking to make?". Whenever possible, as politely as possible, avoid answering this question with a number: it is best to let them know that you are "open". If they continue to ask this question in future interviews, prior to an offer, it means that you are still sitting on the shelf or, at best, in their cart. Again, don't give them an answer other than "open" or you are very likely to be "re-shelved". Why? Because they are not sold yet; you are still one of a hundred products that are bombarding them with the message "buy me". If you cost too much, or too little, it will raise questions about your integrity, quality and more.

Ironically, if you stall this money conversation, you are much more likely to receive an offer within your desired range. If you don't think so, consider this; once you are at the checkout and find out that your selected item costs more than expected, do you buy it? Very often you will. Why? 1) it is the only item in front of you 2) you've been looking forward to "taking it home" 3) you expended valuable time and energy in this process and don't want it to be wasted 4) nobody wants to question their own decision making process 5) the thought of going backwards to repeat the process all over again is undesirable.

When I lead workshops on the topic of negotiation, there is often controversy because people, understandably, feel very emotional about their money. Are you convinced by my recommendations or do you still think that your best bet is to be "honest" upfront?